Thinker Bell

Superficial world..confirmed!

2007-09-17T01:47:00.000+08:00

Dissapointment with the world i realise was not what i felt personally, I actually found a friend who feels the same way! Stephanie! High five!So happy. It is not only me alone feeling that the worl judges its book by its cover. " don't judge a book by its cover' haha! What ever crap essay that i wrote in high school does not exist in the real world! Wake up junie!

Life is a single's journey/....don't u think so? ok...so let's say u r married, u still have to live ur own life, dont u. Like mum and dad, everyone in the house goe to work masing-masing, comes back at different times, then they masing-masing do their own stuff.then sleep. everything on own. its just the presence is felt. I guess..love is just like that....action speak louder than words..that is so true...and even just by being present, that is enough, that is love...well..spoken..loud and clear...how nice it is to be in love........

Chun Mun's stag party

2007-09-16T00:24:00.001+08:00

Went to Chun Mun's stag party today. He is so romantic. Wrote a 5 page long love poem for the girl just to ask her : would u be my gf?. THen he made a home-made video just to propose to her? HE said the first time he heard her voice on the hp, he knew she was the one! possibile a not? sounds too good to be true. Hmmmmmmmmmmmm always wonder when will my turn be... and if it be my turn, how is it gonna be? Dare not expect much though as the more u expect, the greater the dissapointment will be. Oh well, I am just gonna let it be whatever and leave it as a surprise, no point hoping so much as it is still a looooooooooooooong journey, i think.

Good guys? extinct already la. except...maybe for my dad and grandpa. But, u say single good guys?no la...dun think can find. If got also good girls, aplenty! Example? my hoisemates lo! No one can beat them man!! And Adeline Siew also!. I keep praising them right? Ya, because they are really good people, their heart and sould, body and mind, all out for God, it is as though they no longer belong to themselve, everything they do, they do it all for GOd, not to show people how good they are, not to boast, but you can truly see it is from the bottom of their heart. Even when in finding partners. It is as though they don't care anymore. SO long a GOd is with them, they are contented already. Many of us today feel as though we are incomplete without a partner, but , it is not true at all. From the lives of my housemates and the christian friends I had in Glasgow, I could see just how complete life can be with God alone.

Out of final fantasy

2007-09-15T02:19:00.000+08:00

Seems like after graduation I have been thinking about a lot of things, of work, finance, family, boyfriends, etc....just a whole bundle! Its really funny how what the systme taught us in our high school is so different from reality. Now, i tend to understand why they sing those songs ( etc. Avril avinge song, cranberries ) . They say money is not important, but, in reality it is, without money u can do nothing. But then again, it is such a rat race world , i have come ot a point that, enough i never enough, no matter how rich u r , u will always desire more, so the best it to be contented and happy with watever u have. Not to say that so contented that u jus fold u arms and live a it is. COntnted to such a point that u do not covet, that way u can progress healthily. But, watever it is, helath and happiness are the two most important things in life. And how do u atttain these? Through having a good relationship with God and your family. Seriously, I have tried staying away fr these two things, tried mixing wih the world, see how it goes....but...it was all emptiness....nothing was as fulfilling as having God a my Saviour and my Famlily as my backbone. I am saying that ur family are really important in ur life. They have seen u through thick and thin... and will always be there for u especially ur mum!

How about friends? haih...after being out in the world to work, when i compare the xtian friend and non-xtian friend, i truly see a big diffence between them. In the xtian friends, I see contentment, selflessness, grace, kindness, forgiveness, holiness. But, the non-xtian friends, they do not say what they mean ( and many times I kena conned! ) Do you know how much it hurts to kena 'conned' ? even if it be for joking purposes. I know..they jut kidding but still...if u say something, u have to mean it! That is what Vivian always say :" you have to mean what u say' you don't say sorry simply, or thank u simply, u haveto mean it from the bottom of ur heart! but, no, some ppl are jut so superficial , they make friend with u jus because they know u might be of value to them in future . Haih...so disapointed with this cut-throat world man! Why can't lofe be a simple as abc. we make friends because we love them just like Jesus Loved us no matter who we are, what colour or how rich we are. If only everything was jus as pure it is, wouldn's the world be a better place?

There is really much o learn fr thi real world. I am really truly shockd out of my ideal fantasy world. I am awaken. Fairy tales are not true, now only do i realise they are mere fairy tales and have resolved to not read any of these fairy tale book. There are o prince charming, no cinderella, u have to work everything out with your bare hands! It is really so painfu to know that prince charming can never happen to you, but oh well, what to do, what is yours is yours, what is not is not, everything is in God's hand.

Growing Up

2007-09-15T02:03:00.001+08:00

Went to many places today. Instead of staying at home being depressed , I went to Mum's CG and then later to Suet Ling's Birthday party. It is indeed shocking and weird to see ppl growing and changing. Its funny. It is as though you jus cant control it. I jut realise that u really cannot control anything that happens around you. Just like after a year, Zi Ying, ZI XIng, Zi Ning, ZI han, wow,,they have all grown sooo tall..u just cant control, cant comprehend. I really think that I am really thinking to much. I have wasted my precious youth 5 years trying to control that which i cant. I hope its not too late to turn back time yet. It is only now that my hormones are running. WHy did I ever chose the path which damage me.. I have so much to offer to the world, look at how i bright up the life of the hp man, and the lady buying ice-cream....I have so much to offer to the world! WHy give it up just for one stupid absurd thing! I have lost 5 precious years.

It is only throough my 1 year living with my precious, gracious housemates that I truly realise that I can be accepted as who I am no matter who I turn out to be and I really owe my life to them. Without them, I would have been dead without me evern realising it. It was them who woke me up, who gave me back my self worth. Although the journey is still long, and although each of us has gone our own way, I believe, iN CHrist we are a family and I hope, Vivian, Joyce, Anna, that we will stay as friends forever. THanks for everything, I know thouand thank Yous are just not enough.. but I truly from the bottom of my heart, thank you and thank you again. Because of u guys, I continue to live today and wil continue to do so even though all odds all evil temptation comes by, everytime they come, i wil remember what u guys always say especially Joyce's words : ' Don't even think about it "

I will not.......i will try ....i will try....until the battle is won....the day when I become victorious over this , that is the day, I realy mut have a massive celebration! and u guys will be my bridesmaid!

peterborough memories

2007-07-16T05:01:00.000+08:00

Uncle Fu wah and Lianne

pigging out.............

smile for the camera!!!!if

Lianne and I fighting over the salad...she too loves her veggies

Sis trying to teach a 8month old how to ride a tricycle?great ambitions, sis!

Mum...the 'cook'

the cook and her lovely assisntant, Cheng fong che che

Lynsey, Me, sis and Lianne all ready to roll...

2006-04-11T10:21:00.000+08:00

Are u contented?

2005-12-26T14:18:00.000+08:00

More than laziness...i think our society today really lacks contentment. u have a gf..but still..u flirt around when u see a gal u think is prettier than ur gf justin hope to get a better looking gf..haih..men..men...boys boys...how realistic!!! Why does boys always and i mean always have to look at the wrapper and not in its content? is not the inner package that is more important than how the package is wrapped? haih...so dissapointed w em. tell me..just tell me.. which guy will never look at the outside package before deciding to make a move? none that a know of!! They want the best looking gal, the gal with the most curvacious figure to be their gf...y? they want to be envied by their friends... wat are we girls to them man? a trophy to display around and show off to their friends?! ergggghhh!!! Even though how good an angel that gal maybe.. its never enough to satisfy them.. they will never be contented with the 6-star treatment they get from their not so pretty, consolation prize girlfriend...and in the end.. another heart breaking story unfolds...haih.saddening guys! who do they think they are?

back to contentment..same way goes to girls..always complaining and comparing.non-stop!!! Once a gal is prettier than u 'aw..that gal..not pretty enough la...head too big, buttocks too small etc etc....' even if u do complement her to others or tel others 'aw..she is really.pretty' ...then it follows' wished i had those eyes, those lips...etc...' we are never contented, never happy with watever we have!!when will we ever come in tune with our own self...when are we ever gonna be grateful for whatever we have? I guess.. thats why Jesus came from heaven to earth.. to teach us the lesson of Godliness with contentment... to count our blessing for each and everything that we have. we complain that we have short legs, but wat about those who dont have legs?..should they kill themslef and die instead??

Jolly Jelly Xmas

2005-12-26T13:47:00.000+08:00

Xmas..of course go church la...but the preacher today not very good. he was a bit cheong hei... and a bit too much of info to input into my sleepy head.. very tired a!! yesterday work till 7 pm then have to go for xmas street party in TTDI. met Wei Jin from medic IMU. i couldnt really remem his name. hehe..just remem his name start with w. but, surprise surprise..he remembered my name!!! haha!! tot i was just a small small small fry...how come they can remem my name but i can't? do u think i have poor memory..i think i have amnesia. hehe..neway,.. met wern jun also and few others. met Grace also...boy, could she sing!! she said she entered MI but got kicked out the first session. What judges we have la....Grace so talented u noe...but...kicked out? they must have real thick mucus in their ears.!!!the street party got soo much much things to eat.rojak..lok lok, capati, beef, lamb etc...been eating like a pig this xmas. so many invites..soo much good food. Don't be surprised if u find a pig walking aroung imu in 3 january.. haha!!

anyway..back to church..after service was another great feast for me. One aunty made konnyaku jelly!!! MY FAV!! haha!! After 1 month of deprivation of konnnayku jelly ( due to financial constrains ( konnyaku jelly very ex ler...and mum also nagging me..advising me to stop eating so much junkies !) this was the time for me to release my self/...i practically finished all the jelly she made i think it amounts to 2 packtets of jelly, it was a lot..but i had a time of my life haha!! there were longans and nata de coco..so it was so delicious i couldnt stop..( me being me ;p) , of course beside jelly..i had others also.. the red bean soup la, cream puff la, porridge la etc la. Dunno why... lately,.i have been craving for red bean.. everyday i must eat somwthing too do with red bead,,, be it red bean bun , soup or angku.. and boy.. the amount of red bean i eat... 20 red bean angku in one go. that despite having three meals a day!!! wonder wat is worng wif me...i think i must really stop my craziness..once i like a thing i just go all out for it .. once the season goes off...it dissapears. But, funny,...i can only eat so much when im alone...but when i am with people....i can control myself. maybe this is wat they call it as boredom or eating when i am feeling lonely. anyway...have made a new year resolution to stop this craziness. perhaps i might even be able to shed a few kilos!!!( all the gals in IMU seems to be in a diet frenzy..look at grace!!! stick think but yet...i heard she is on a diet!! wat about yih yang, sharon, Kimberly... etc....?same case! is a competition going on or am i missing out something? do update me if i am lost somehwere in IMU. eating just a curry puff or doughnut for lunch?..hmmm....is that filling? come to think of it,,,,isnt it plain torturing to be depriving urself of one of the greatest thing you can enjoy as a human being?i dunno....sometimes they eat so little it makes me feel like a total pig !! haha!!

Xmas present at the beep of the hp

2005-12-26T11:43:00.000+08:00

Xmas....the most beautiful and wonderful season of the year...or so it seems....so ...how did i celebrate my xmas?

Hey hey hey!! its d day when Jesus was born!!! The saviour who died on the cross to wash away all our sin!!! i mean...u see.. we are all by nature so sinful...even though how goodie good a person u may be ( outwardly) but...im sure none of us, yes, none of us can run away from sin, from saying, talking or even dreaming bad things !!! Even simple things like : ' oh, how i wish i had those eyes, those lips, those hair...etc' is a sin!!! Aw, man....how can we be as perfect as Jesus? we can't. i can't. Try as i might, every single day... i just can't run away from sinning!I guess that's why Jesus is so important to me.. to forgive me everyday.. and take away whatever dirty stuff that i have done. In view of how important Jesus is to me.....so how did i celeb the bday of my bestest best friend, who knows and bears all my probs?

well...stayed up late till 00:00 just to wish merry xmas through sms to all my friends . then, a hug and a kiss to each of the family member..and off i was to bed. So tired! worked whole day! sold 64 bottles of Pantene together with may yee. oh ya... talking about that.. haha...it was really a blessed day for me. In the last minute, my supervisor called and told me to find another promoter to promote pantene leave-on hair mosituriser. If i can find, the commission is rm20 for each 25 bottles solf. If can't find, i myself have to sell 30 bottles only to get rm10!! so much difference!! Of course...i pia ming find ppl to work. sms to so many ppl...but none was available. Then, just before i slept,..i sms may yee. i tot haiya...just try la..she last time told me she taught tuition etc...maybe...just maybe there might be a slight chance she will want to work. so i sent a sms to her. in my heart, i actually tot she 95% wouldn't want to work wan la...i mean...she so pretty and looks so elegant and like millionaires daughter. summore she so thin and fragile...want her to work as a promoter ???? It will be more like an ant performing a Herculean task! HAHA!!

But....
Hey Hey Hey...the next morning.. (with the hp still in my grip )i recieved an sms. she said Yes!!! somemore say her bro gf wan to work as well!! this is doulbe blessing from God!!The person that i least expected to agree to work actually said YES!!! i was so shocked!!!and Happy also la..so now i dun have to work so hard and can at the same time earn double the pay..thanx may yee!!

My Lastest Job

2005-11-28T22:30:00.000+08:00

Promoting Wall's Mini Cornetto

The Most meaningful Christian Song To Me

2005-11-10T00:06:00.000+08:00

Told this to thomasboy before...but...wouldliketo share it...its very meaningful...everytime i sing this song..i cant help but cry

Before the world began
You were on His mind
And every tear you cry
Is precious in His eyes
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come

Nothing you can do
Could make Him love you more
And nothing that you've done
Could make Him close the door
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come

Come to the Father
Though your gift is small
Broken hearts, broken lives
He will take them all
The power of the Word
The power of His blood
Everything was done
So you would come
Before the world began
You were on His mind
And every tear you cry
Is precious in His eyes
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come

Nothing you can do
Could make Him love you more
And nothing that you've done
Could make Him close the door
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come

Come to the Father
Though your gift is small
Broken hearts, broken lives
He will take them all
The power of the Word
The power of His blood
Everything was done
So you would come
Before the world began
You were on His mind
And every tear you cry
Is precious in His eyes
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come

Nothing you can do
Could make Him love you more
And nothing that you've done
Could make Him close the door
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come

Come to the Father
Though your gift is small
Broken hearts, broken lives
He will take them all
The power of the Word
The power of His blood
Everything was done
So you would come

Fix U

2005-11-09T22:46:00.000+08:00

This song is really romantic. Never really took notice of Chris Martin,thought he couldn't really sing...but..i was wrong. He can sing so well!!Listened to this song over 20 times...still not bored...the song actually makes me feel like marrying to him!!! hahah!!Quite jealous of Gwyneth...haha!!

Coldplay - "Fix You"

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above and down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face

And I whoo owoo wo..aa a a a aaa

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you.

Coldplay

too self-conscious for good???

2005-08-12T12:08:00.000+08:00

hmmm..i have been wondering...is it bcoz i have dyed my hair, i have become prettier or is it that i look weird? how come i go everywhere also ppl look at me one? haha!! really strange that i should say this in my blog, but that s just how i really feel. actually, ii dun really feel comfortable you know when ppl look at you, even if you don't know the person. Do you feel that same? Do you feel that pppl are always looking at you ?or is it just my stupid self-consious mind telling me that ppl r looking at me?hmmmmm..is not life again weird?..

I have come to a conclusion ( which is no conclusion at all ! )
Ppl look at you ( even if they don't know you ) bcoz,
1. You are pretty... ( which i dont really think so in my case, though i would like
to believe it is, there r so many other pretty lads! y me? )
2. There is something on your face ( maybe your face is smudgy, or it could be even
bcoz there is a 'nose shit' mucus hanging out of
your nose !!HA! HA!This is real common, believe me, ive seen it in so many ppl.
but, how do you tell them without embarrasing them? for me, ill just
tell.hehe..although it would be really funnily embarassing. )
3. They have got nothing better to do than to look at ppl(whoever it is, ugly,pretty)
4. They look at you bcoz you look at them ( then, they will think u r looking at
them, and they think y you look at them, then, they will think, you look at them
bcoz you think they are pretty, then , they snub at you just bcoz they think you
think they are pretty ) Man, how i hate all these egoistic self-centered, think
they are these real real beautiful beings existing in this world as if they are
the queen of the universe.Get real ppl!!! everyone is beautiful in thier own
personal way. even if you are seriously physically more beautiful than the
others,and have a nice body, that doesn't give you any credit or whatsoever to
snub at ppl who are less of you!)

conclusion : i still dunno...y do ppl look at you, when u go p/malam, market, uni,y?
don't look at you cannot meh? ....they got nothing better to do meh?

Best friends

2005-07-04T13:28:00.000+08:00

Wow!!!I kinda regret writing the previous post. hehe...all the sudden, everyone like treat me so nice...ask me go here goo there..haha..so funny.But, i dunno wan to say yes, i will go out with them or noo i dont want.

---If say yes ,
1.i scared i will ffk again then they may not ask me to go out again.Then ,
loner again.
2. If i go out with them, i may trouble them,eg, i do somethings they don't like or
they have to 'zau' me or i cannot make decision , they have to wait for me
etc....i dunno lah! fan!

----if say no ,
1. then i will be a bad friend, they keep asking and i always say no, u also will be
sick and tried of having such friend la...

haih....y does life have to be so difficult? y have to think so so much? haih...junie...wats wrong with u?

Self-esteem and friends

2005-07-01T16:12:00.000+08:00

You know,When i see a bunch of friends hanging out together, i always wonder...how come i do not have such a life? a life of hanging out with friends...its funny, but i really do realize i am such a loner. i asked anson why. He said its because i always fang fei ji ( fly aeroplane ) .Maybe it is true, but, everytime i want to go out or hang out,i have this great big fear. Fear of what you might wonder, and sumtimes i wonder too. i dunno, its a fear that i wont be able to fit into the group. Its just that, i always feel..i am just this really really small , small, small person, a person so insignificant in this world, i dun deserve to have friends treating me nice, or friends to hang out with me. I am afraid that if i go out with them, i would trouble them somehow, like if i want to buy something and they don't, but still they have to accompany me out of obligation. I just think that i am too small a person to deserve people to go out of their way to meet my needs. People are selfish i know, and people wouldnt like to trouble themselves. It is really lonely when u r alone. Truly depressing, but i guess, in loneliness, u learn independece. and being independent is seriously not easy. its painful when all alone u walk, then u see ur friends all walking together, u see them smiling and laughing together, and u wonder why are u so alone?wat have u done to have no friends that walk along with u? friends really are important arent they? I think to find a friend who truly cares for u and who accpets u no matter what or who u r is really hard.

Ya, its true, i have many friends, but, most of them are just hi bye friends. maybe i really do have a problem. maybe, i really am not worth having a real true friend. then again, true friends, one or two is enough is it?yes, i think it is. so, i shall try to physic myself alwasy and tell myself, its ok to be alone, its ok to have 1,2 true friend and 10000 hi bye friends. If any of you think i really do have a problem or if i am really not a good friend and need to change , please do tell me, i really want to be a better person. if i can. thanks.

Birthday

2005-07-01T16:00:00.000+08:00

well...birthday was long time ago...but. am really blessed to have real good friends to celebrate with. 21 this year...old di.hehe...with 21 comes loads and loads of unwanted proble, i think

my best friend who just came back from singapore wanted to throw me a surprise party.but...too bad, i found out about it ..hehe. mum wanted to throw me a big bash party, then, i tot, who am i to desreve a party,,i am just a nobody, who would want to celebrate with me?if it were not for my cg friends in uni and my high school best friend, i would have again been a loner on my birthday. but, i really do wanna tahnk them a big deal and all my uni freinds, even if it were be just greeting me ' HAppy Birthday" was enough to make me feel so special on my supposedly special day. Every bday, i sure will cry wan. crying not of laughter, but crying bcoz i am sad, and that's bcoz of my bday. Ever since form 3 , i hated my bday. everyone would wish that everyday was their bday, but, me, NEVER !!! I always wished that it never come and never will come. Not bcause of the fear of getting old ( no way !!I dun even think of it ) Just bcoz of the expereinces i had in my past bdays.they were never a happy wan. One time, i had a bday party, and it was a lousy bday, everyone was bored, and i felt very guilty for inviting them to my party. So, i cried bcoz the party was not good enough to entertain my guest. SO, from then on, i never had a bday celebration.

This year, mum said its my 21st bday, must celeb, i said :' no need la' the whole family was curious, but i never told them why. it was mainly my fear... fear that i will not be a good host. i still fear it now, guess it will continue to haunt me till i grow old...so..it seems that a happy bday party like the rest will never come true for me.But, i really must say thank you guys and girls for making my this 21st bday special to me. appreciate it a lot.

Raleigh Intro week photos

2005-06-21T13:17:00.000+08:00

Raleigh Intro week photos

2005-06-21T13:13:00.000+08:00

kissing dating goodbye?

2005-05-15T22:28:00.000+08:00

since i am so so so so so free...i decided on reading instead of watching real meaningless tvs and movies...save money also ..hehe

'i kissed dating goodbye'. Anyone interested in borrowing?it is really a very interesting book. Talks about personal values and prinsipals. Many people might find it very extreme and might even be intimidated by the author's views and opinions on dating. but, i guess it's up to individual.

Accident...

2005-04-28T15:19:00.000+08:00

Monday

was the worst day of the year.!! i answered badly in pharmaco, was so upset about it , didnt have mood to study for biopharm, so watch lots tv to distract myself from thinking about it. Anyway, me being me, wanted to do something wacky for the day to destress myself. A trip to the pasar malam would do the trick!! So, i decided, why not i ride on the motorbike ? Ya. ok. so, i kinda persuaded sis to go with me on my motor ride. But, instead of dad being the driver, i was !!! that is without license.so..there goes another of my life adventure which turns out to be a disaster...why so i always end up with tragic endings???guess...i am jus a 'sao ba xing' haha!!!no wonder till now also no boyfren...haha!!!

EXAM OVER !!! YEEE Hah!!!!

2005-04-28T15:15:00.000+08:00

wah!!! so extremely, tremendously, relieved that exam is over. All the horror of studying in the small room facing all those stupid carzy books.!!! Exams are so artificial. U memerosie the module notes, go into exam hall, then u vomit everthing you memorise onto the sheet of paper.then, u forget everythting about it. stupid exams!!! I like to do homework but....exams?..hmmm....

so, now that exam over, must celebrate !! but.. dunno how to celeb now

why Love?

2005-04-07T12:54:00.000+08:00

Its not about wanting wat u wat ..but a matter of whether that thing wants you...ain't that true. you see..it's not wrong to love someone, is it?.but. prob is..if you love someone, it really does hurt si badly too know that that person you love, loves u not.ain't that true?so, then, another question, why love, when it hurts so much?why love when love does not love u?hmmmm

talked to my mummy recently...she said

1." never love a person who loves everybody, because, in the end...you will end up loving everybody as well..." get what i mean here?

2. never love a person who disrespects his/her parents-- second thing to consider

why is it that the person you love , don't love you in return?.is it that you are not good enough for d fella?..is it that you are not compatible for d person?or is it just simply that..God has someone else in mind for you?..
but...again..the question..how do you know..that someone is the someone?..huh?..confusion again....love..so mysterious and killing !!!

ruined spaghetti

2005-04-07T12:22:00.000+08:00

my sis requested that i cook spaghetti for her...i think it was nice, she said it was ok..complained that i put in too much tomatoes.hmmm..but too bad..cant eat much coz i got beta-carotene poison. but, i really like it...especially the meatballs..yummmm....cerewet little sister,,,next tiem dont coook for her di!.hmmgh!

kids....

2005-04-07T12:12:00.000+08:00

so sleepy now..done pharmaco draft but i still had to burn midnight oil....cos have to edit the draft. i din go uni ..so i should have even more time to do..and not brun midnight oil. but...i had to help mummy teach english to the kids!! those kids are so naughty naughty..everytime "game, game ,game" only know how to play game. so, this time i gave them a dictation test!! funny..they enjoyed it..cos they can get points!! kids...its all about out doing their counterparts... that's the only way too motivate them to do something..every little thing they do have to realte to their points..noisy..minus marks..dont' finish on time, minus marks also!!!im a meany!! hehe...

Confusion and perfection!!

2005-03-10T13:01:00.000+08:00

I am confused by friends around me...haih..

do you think that ur friends do you a favour just because they expect a favour back from you sometime later?...hmmmm..

i know of one friend who goes all out just to help me..withou expecting anything from him..and he is just such a nice person to everyone ...every girl and every boy he knows...still not attached..( i think maybe got chance, hehe ) but... i know of another friend who helps me...in someway. i thought he was sincere in helping...but little did i realise..that person expected something in return!! onyl got to know about it when we started arguing on some ridiculously minor stuff.but, i must say..it was truly entirely my fault for bringing the subject in..but ..at least i got to know the true coulours of the person. so you treat a person nice out of pure love or do you treat a person nice just to expect something form that person later?let us all just ponder upon that question...

remember : " a slip of the foot you may recover,
a slip of the tongue will last forever !!! "

To love or not to love...that is a question to be

2005-03-07T12:46:00.000+08:00

Just read hua ying's blog.

question asked :
* If you know someone that you love will never love you, will you still love
him/her?
==== i guess.. its a risk everyone have to take. =========* If you know
someone that you love will never able to be with you, will you still
wait for him/her?
====it is yet another risk ======

* If you love someone and are afraid to confide, will you still face the fear of
letting him/her know?
==== yet another ====

* If you are rejected by someone, will you still have the courage to love him/her
still?
====and another +++

is not love just so amazingly echanting, fascinating, intriguing..but yet at the same time so complicated, sophisticated and ????( lots of question marks?)

you love him but yet at the same time you hate him...

it's so nice to be secretly liking someone...the feeling is like being in a movie...or i dunno..nice to be observing someone from afar.
.
but at the same time so suffering...because..you JUST CAN"T TELL!!!once you tell...you are DEAD MEAT !!!!

Even though it be agonizing and suffering...but we still enjoy indulging in such feelings.is not human beings just so funny?liking the things that they don't like and enjoy?hmmmm....

How to Know if a Girl Likes You?

2005-03-01T15:52:00.000+08:00

How to Know if a Girl Likes You?

Easy. Don't ask. Just open your eyes.

Buying Signals

ACTION speaks louder than words. Don't wait for words, look for ACTION.

You just have to look for positive signs, or buying signals. If:

-she brushes up against you
-she laughs when you say something (even when it's not funny!)
-she gives you a compliment
-she's turning red when you talk to her
-she gets nervous when you're around
-she's nervous while talking to you
-she's playing with something (pen, bracelet, necklace...)
-she's twirling her hair
-she fingers hers lips
-she didn't mention to you she had a boyfriend, but she did with others
-she's checking in the conversation if you have a girlfriend
-she reveals her feelings, and say: just kidding
-she tries to be with you
-she's trying to sell herself (sports, work, cuisine, sensitivity, wealth...)
-she offers you something
-she makes an effort with her outfit
-she tries to be more beautiful (hairdresser, new clothes, lipstick, perfume...)
-she fakes jealousy for fun
-she invites you indirectly or if she suggests any activity
-she likes to borrow your jumper, your jacket, your pen, your cap...
-she asks you for help when she could ask somebody else
--she likes your firstname and likes to pronounce it
-she likes your clothes
-she's asking for help
-she wants to be with you
-she wants to hear your voice
--she's touching you while talking to you (arm, hand, thigh...)
-she's touching you "accidently"
-she likes to be close to you or in your space
-she's usually looking at you
-she's looking at you when leaving a room

How to know if a guy likes you?

2005-03-01T15:50:00.000+08:00

How to know if a guy likes you?

You don't have to love in words, even through silences love is always heard.

BUYING SIGNALS
ACTION speaks louder than words, is a good dating advice. Don't wait for words, look for ACTION.

You just have to look for positive signs, or buying signals if:

-he comes close to you
-he tries to make you laugh
-he asks you questions
-he tries to make you talk about yourself
-he asks for your phone number or Email
-he tries to demonstrate in the conversation his men's qualities
-he's trying to sell himself (sports, work, wealth... )
-he offers help
-he gives you a compliment
-he blushes when you talk to him
-you see he gets nervous when you're around
-he's nervous while talking to you (hands, eyes, voice...usually you can notice because he's doing t- much
-he plays with an object (cigarette, pen, glass...)
-he can't help looking at you, and when you look at him: he suddenly looks in another direction
-he can't help making eye-contact with you
-he reveals his feelings in a disguised way, and say: just kidding
-he tries to be with you
-he offers you something
--he makes an effort with his outfit
-he tries to be more hansome (hairdresser, new clothes, shoes, watch...)
-he fakes jealousy for fun
-he invites you indirectly or he suggests any activity
-he likes to borrow anything from you, (typex, pen, rubber, clothes...)
-when there's nothing left for you, he says: you can take mine
-he asks you for help when he could ask somebody else
-he likes your firstname and likes to pronounce it
-he likes your clothes
-he wants to be with you
-he wants to hear your voice
-he touches you accidentally or gently (arm, shoulder, hand...)
-he likes to be close to you or in your space
-he's usually looking at you
-he's looking at you when leaving a room
-he gazes in your eyes with love

pomelo again

2005-03-01T15:16:00.000+08:00

Ants Climbing a Tree

2005-03-01T13:03:00.000+08:00

Ants Climbing a Tree (Ants Creeping up a Tree, Climbing a Hill)I

Yes, I know that the morsels of ground beef or pork are supposed to represent "ants" while the vermicelli noodles make up the "tree." But - ants? Couldn't they have chosen something a little more appetizing? Then again, I suppose "stones in the sand" doesn't sound great, either. In any event, this recipe has an advantage over the others in that it doesn't require a great deal of preparation.

Kung Pao Chicken

2005-03-01T13:02:00.000+08:00

Kung Pao Chicken

It's common knowledge that this dish is named after an official; however, from there it all gets rather murky. In some versions Kung Pao is a general who lived during the Ching dynasty. In others, he is a crown prince who discovered this dish while travelling and brought it back to the Imperial Court. There's even some confusion about whether the dish originated in Shanghai or Szechuan.
Cookbook author Helen Chen provides an interesting twist on the story. In Chinese Home Cooking, she states that Kung Pao was the title given to the person charged with protecting the heir apparent, as Kung meant castle and Pao meant to protect. During a certain period, the Kung Pao was a man whose favorite dish happened to be spiced chicken with peanuts, and thus over time it was named after him. Whatever the case, the stories demonstrate the Chinese belief that naming a dish after an important figure gives it more prestige.

Lion's Head Meatballs

2005-03-01T13:01:00.000+08:00

Lion's Head Meatballs
It's easier to understand the name once you've seen the dish. The meatballs are huge - roughly the size of tennis balls. Often they are served with cabbage, meant to represent the lion's mane.

ever wondered why is Beggar's chicken called Beggars chicken?

2005-03-01T13:00:00.000+08:00

Beggar's Chicken

This is a wonderful story. A homeless, starving beggar is wandering along a road when he catches sight of a chicken. Desperate for food, he kills the chicken by wringing its neck. Lacking a stove, he covers the chicken in mud, makes a fire and bakes it. (One version has him plucking the feathers off the chicken as he eats).

At this point an Emperor passes by with his entourage. Attracted by the aroma of the baked chicken, he stops and dines with the beggar, demanding to know how he created such a delicious meal. "Beggar's chicken" is subsequently added to the list of dishes served at the Imperial court.

This story has a footnote. In "The Chinese Kitchen", Eileen Yin-Fei Lo notes that people are not always happy with the name of the dish. In Beijing you'll sometimes see Beggar's Chicken called "Fu Guai Gai," or "Rich and Noble Chicken."

Origins of names

2005-03-01T12:58:00.000+08:00

There is a mystique that surrounds the origin of certain recipe names.
Take Caesar salad, for example. People often assume that the classic combination of romaine lettuce and dressing dates back to the time of Roman Emperor Julius Caesar. In fact, its origins are much more recent, although the exact circumstances defy documentation. In one version, it was invented in 1924 by Caesar Cardini. If true, the Tijuana restaurateur must have been amazed by the confusion he unleashed when he chose to bestow his own name on his culinary masterpiece.

Another view holds that Caesar Salad was created in 1906 in the United States, and named in honor of the Romans. This makes sense when you consider that the Romans held romaine lettuce in high esteem, believing it had health-giving properties. (In fact, it is rumored that Emperor Caesar Augustus erected a statue in honor of the leafy green vegetable).
And then there's Chicken Cordon Bleu. Try as you might, you won't find a step-by-step procedure for stuffing chicken breasts with ham and cheese in any of the standard French cookbooks. While its origins are difficult to trace, the dish probably debuted in New Orleans, the brainchild of a chef who once trained at the France's world-famous cooking school Le Cordon Bleu.

Like all great mysteries, the truth about how these two famous recipes came to be named will probably never be known. The Chinese have their own collection of tales surrounding the origin of certain recipes. Here are a few examples:

3 recipe name features
- appearance of the dish - lion's head meatballs, ants climbing a tree

- person who supposedly invented the dish or caused the dish to be invented (kung pao chicken, pockmarked tofu, beggar's chicken)

Lop Cheung 臘腸: Chinese Sausage

2005-02-25T10:56:00.000+08:00

I've lately seen some websites in English referring lop cheung (臘腸) simply as the smoked sausage. Sadly, this explanation shows a woeful ignorance of the truth. Lop cheung is so named because it was usually made during the lunar month of December, the 'Lop' Yuen (臘月) in ancient Chinese. It can be

1) wind-dried (most common; cookery classics say the wind can preserve the meat's 'umami'
whereas sunlight can enchant its 'scent'),
2) baked or
3) smoked (least common; because the sausage is already well-seasoned). It is a member of the
Big Three preserved meat family: the remainder are the Chinese smoked ham (火腿) and the
wind-dried duck (臘鴨).

Basically there are two types of Chinese sausage. One is purely made of pork and the other of pork and duck liver mixture, something I reckon as the Chinese take of the 'boudin noir' because it is also almost black in color (though not made of blood). The fat/lean ratio for Chinese sausage used to be half/half, but, thanks to the ever-growing cholesterol censorship nowadays, the ratio is leaning towards the lean side (about 2 fat to 8 lean) -- some even comes up with the 100% fat-free version. Apart from the meat, flavorings such as the soy sauce and notably some mei gwei lu (rose rice wine) are also added to the mixture before filling into the casings.

There are many ways to cook these sausages. Take the duck liver sausage as an example: stir-fry it with greens is of course a brainy one; fry it with glutinous rice and eggs is also a laudable classic... yet the best way to fully appreciate this delicacy is to steam it with plain rice -- it deserves to be treated as chiefly as the black truffle. As banal as it may seem, every sausage connoisseur would agree this is the best way to taste the sausage to its fullest.

the symbollic meanings of the Food eaten during CNY

2005-02-25T10:48:00.000+08:00

Kung Hei Fat Choy!

Kung Hei Fat Choy! Wish you all a prosperous and sated stomach in the Year of Rooster.
In less than two days we Chinese will bade au revoir to the Year of Monkey and greet salut to the Year of Rooster (probably with some firecrackers too): Tuesday is the Eve while Wednesday the first day of the latter(to learn more about the Chinese Horoscope, check here, to get a grasp of the your fortune in the year of Rooster, click here).

When is better then, to have the auspicious food for this very festival -- the Chinese New Year -- explained than now? I guess what is unique in Chinese culinary culture, when compared with others, is that we very often eat food in contextual way. We eat a food very often because of its name, its outlook and its association with good things in life, rather than its taste. Yes, when it comes to food, we are super superstitious!

Some food are eaten for their names while some simply because they "got the look." Lets have the mojo of Chinese food decoded one by one.

Eat it because of phonetic similarity:

The Pomelo: its pronunciation in Chinese, "lok yue," means "with good career and rich life" when read in reverse (yue lok).

The Mandarin: it's pronounced as "gek" in Chinese, which shares the same pronunciation as "good luck."

The Apple:
the first part of it is pronounced as "ping" in Chinese, homophone to the word "safe."

The Banana:
the second part of it is pronounced as "jiu," homophone to the word "embrace," hence eating it symbolizes embracing good things in life, especially money.

The Fish:
it is pronounced as "yu" in Chinese, homophone to the word "surplus." We eat fish on the first day of Chinese New Year and we never, never finish the fish. We always leave some bits of it on the plate so as to symbolize there's surplus in our house in the coming year.

The Rice Cake: you may also call it rice pudding or Chinese New Year rice cake. It's pronounced as "ling gou," which sounds the same as the word "year's high." Grown-ups eat this with the hope to reaching new height in their career or production while the growing ups eat this to becoming taller in the coming year. The traditional ones are made in round shape like a cake. But pictured here is a special edition, providentially made to form for the New Year: a crossover of two lucky contexts: "gou" and "yu." As far as food goes, it is the luckiest one can get...

The Peanut: called "fa san" in Cantonese or "hua sun" in Mandarin. Either way, the ending half shares the same pronunciation as the word "live." Thus, it is eaten for longevity.

The Lettuce: pronounced as "san choy," homophone to the words "gaining money."

The Black Moss: pronounced as "fat choy," homophone to the words "getting rich."

The Dried Oyster: pronounced as "ho sei," homophone to the word "booming market."

The Pig's Tongue: pronounced as "lee," homophone to the word "profit."

Seeds of Melon: pronounced as "gua tze." "Tze" is homophone to the word "offspring" in Chinese. Couples eat it with the hope to become parents next year.

Eat it for because of the look:

The Dumplings:
pronounced as "chiotze" in Mandarin. It's shape resembles that of the gold ingots. The myth has it that the more you eat in CNY, the richer you'll be in the coming year. In Beijing, people there play the trick in a more subtle way. Wok-fuls of dumplings are served as in every festivals. However, in Chinese New Year, some dumplings are placed with sugar in the fillings, some with peanuts and one, only one, with a gold coin. For those who end up with the sugared one in their bowls, it is believed that they will have sweet life ahead; those with peanuts longevity and for the lucky glutton with the gold coin, a profitable year ahead.

The Sweetened Deep-fried Sesame Ball:
eat it because it is gold in color, and thus, reminds people the gold ingots.

The Crispy Triangle:
for more or less the same reason as the sesame ball.

The Sesame Cookie:
the middle part of the cookie is fried to cracked, akin a face "cracking a laugh." Its name in Chinese literally means "laughing dates." Dates for its size and laughing for its appearance, I guess...

The Sweetened Glutinous Rice Dumpling:
the sweeten dumpling is round in shape. In Chinese culture, deeply influenced by the Daoist, round shape has the meaning of perfect, harmony and completeness. We eat it in family reunion and festivals with the hope to have the whole family in perfect harmony in the year ahead.

Anson's fav Nian Gao

2005-02-25T10:32:00.000+08:00

年糕

One of the preparation for Lunar New Year is the preparation of Sticky Cake, or Nian Gao. The name of the cake 'nian gao' literally means 'year cake'. Since the word 'gao' has the same pronunciation with another word meaning 'tall' or 'high', people like the name because it means you get higher every year. Children grow taller/higher, exam result better/higher, income higher, number of wives higher, gets higher... oops!

Usually around the second half of the 12th lunar month, people will start preparing Nian Gao. The main ingredient in Nian Gao is glutinous rice flour, which gives it the stickiness. The process involves steaming. During steaming, children are cautioned not to disturb the process like opening the lid to have a look. There's supposed to be a Nian Gao God overlooking the steaming process. If you open the lid, you will disturb Him and He will fly away. Then the steaming process will fail.

Once upon a time, there was some beggar named Zhang who was having an affair with a SYT in his own house. When his Mu Yeh Cha (fierce ugly wife) came back, he quickly went and hide in the chimney. But the chimney was alive and burning! When his wife discovered, it was too late. He turned to ashes already. His ashes flew through the chimney upwards to the sky. Stupid Jade Emperor believed him that he actually committed suicide after he realized his guilt and proceeded to employ him as the Stove/Oven God. Wahahaha!

There is a purpose behind making Nian Gao. This Stove God is a very talkative, very busybody and very kehpoh person. He is also very greedy as far as food is concerned and eats like a pig. On the 24th day of the 12th lunar month, the Stove God will depart from each family to report to the Jade Emperor (his big big boss) regarding the family. About what they eat, what have they done etc. People are afraid of him very much. Afraid that he would talk nonsense and kehpoh in front of Jade Emperor during his report.

You see, once upon a time, there was an old couple. They have only one son. Their son worked in a coal mine. One day, the old man went to visit his son. On his way, he met another weird person. After talking on their way for some time, he came to know that the weird man was actually sent by the stupid and cruel Jade Emperor to collect 100 person from the coal mine to serve as sex slaves to the Jade Emperor.

So the old man panicked. He begged the weird man to let go of his son, which the weird man agreed. So at the coal mine, old man behaved as if he was severely sick by doing all sorts of sick things. Pretended to have stomachache lar, headache lar, schizophrenic lar, menstrual pain lar... oops!

So the son didn't get a chance to decend into the mine for work that day. Shortly after, the mine collapsed, trapping exactly 100 people inside.

For years, nothing happened. One day, the old man really bueh tahan and told his wife what actually happened and how his trick had worked to save their son's life. His wife suddenly realized that the old man whom she has been married to all these years was actually damn blardy genius so they... :P

This was heard by the busybody Stove God. On the 24th day of the 12th month of that year, their Stove God reported this back to the Jade Emperor. Jade Emperor damn tulan. He immediately ordered people to take away the son of that old couple to become his slave.
The people learnt their lesson well. So before the Stove God departs to report to Jade Emperor, they shove a whole chunk of super sticky gluey Nian Gao down the blardy bastard's throat to choke him to half death so that he would talk less in front of the Jade Emperor. Otherwise he would be damn kehpoh and talk nonsense. The tulan Jade Emperor would then give bad luck to the family concerned.

So this, my friends, is the true meaning behind our Nian Gao : a murder weapon against kehpohchis.

Nian Gao in Malaysia commonly come as a short cylinder wrapped in some kind of bamboo leaves. I'll get a photo later. During the prayer to send off the Stove God, one usually cut out some pattern from some red paper and put it on top of the Nian Gao.
Photo stolen from shiokadelicious.com. :P

Nian Gao can be served in different ways. The commonest is steamed. Steamed Nian Gao is very soft like err... semi watery diarrhoea glue. You can use either a pair of chopsticks or fork to dig into it and transfer it to your mouth. Some prefer to dip the chopsticks/fork with the Nian Gao into some shaved coconut before putting it in mouth.

Another way to serve Nian Gao is to deep fry it. Cut un-steamed Nian Gao (which is quite solid) into square pieces and deep fry. You can deep fry along with some other thing like sweet potato or yam dipped in beaten egg and flour etc.

I've heard some Japanese old men got choked to death consuming Nian Gao. Luckily one of them was saved after his daughter managed to shove a vacuum cleaner tube down his windpipe and switched it to 'high'. So, be careful! ^_^

orientation---detective game

2005-02-25T09:37:00.000+08:00

whoa!!! PAndora had such really humongous big round breast!!!...Ah quah shall always remain as aqua..no doubt!!

neway, i thought everything went quite well with not many injuries happening. come to think of it, the number of casualties is way lower than that of B104. hmmm...wonder why the B104s are so prone to injury...????

Highlight of the event i think was Ai Lian's 'famous' junior. I think everyone in P104 knows about it already... hehe...that stuck up girl with her stuck up pants (as Ai Lian puts it). i don't really know her...but she does look snobbish.well...thank her parents for giving her those genes and thank her parents for causing her to get 'extra' punishment, 'extra' dirty water from the seniors..!!!

i think the seniors were having much more fun than the juniors...they were practically playing throughout the whole night!!!whatever it is...i have learnt through yesterday that ..there are certain ppl in our batch that you should never mess up...if not..you will end up in deep H**L. What i mean to say is that...if you kena them 'kau kau' , they will kena you back 3 times as ' kau kau kau'!!!!but, i think life really becomes even more fun with such ppl...so i think i am really happy to be in this batch of fun and happening pharmacists..

reached home at 10.30 pm. whoa...so hungry and tired.....finished all the dinner leftovers and finished 2 big pomelos in the fridge...i think when i am sooo hungry... i always tend to overeat.then....was so tired right after..i went gao gao...

25th wedding anniversary

2005-02-21T16:43:00.000+08:00

hey...my parents are having their 25th wedding anniversary celebration. i am planning to celebrate it for them extravagantly...

has anyone hosted such an event before?
.any good location as to where i should organise it?
..anyone mind educating me about how they actually organised their parent's wedding anniversary?.
what hotels do you all recommend?

.thanks ya

must start studying!!!

2005-02-21T16:29:00.000+08:00

aiyo...today we had microbio tutorial...self-assesment it seemed....i think it felt more like a 'you must strat studying now, junie' kinda tutorial..i studied a little bit..but no use also wan!! what they asked was not really what u could find in the module notes.anyone with me?haha...and joe sat beside me thinking i could help him when the fact was that he helped me even more so...he knew bout the gonorrhea stuff and how it got infected.

so i asked him ' how did you know bout gonnorhea?'
he said "i have it ma... want me to transmit it to you?"
haha!! He is really one great clown joker!!! no wonder he has so many friends...

anyway...having such clownish friends like joe , anson, who never seem to tire me of their jokes makes life in uni so much more relaxing realising the fact that uni life can be so stressful..there is just so much to study in such a short span of time!!!without some crappy jokes ...i really dunno how i am gonna survive in this real competitive world!!!

so...i guess crappy friends are indeed essential in this world ...someone i knew told me he did not like to mix with crappy people who just hang around together and make lame jokes because he thought they were a waste of his time and energy. he preferred friends that could exchange info with him...talk too him about intelletual and practical stuff...but..i think if life was to be sooooooo realistic...sooooo practical , what is fun then?..what is life as a teenager then?..aren't we meant to have fun together and do all these lame things at this stage.is it not only at the older stage that we will be having these 'educational' conversation topics?..anyone with me?...

but.,..my advice remains....have all the fun u wnat while you are still young!! dont' act like an adult while your days as a young adult is numbered while the days as a matured adult will be countless...

today....after micro is yet another day where i feel like another dumbo who knows nothing...haih..must be more rajin from now on...

Favourites....

2005-02-15T16:02:00.000+08:00

I suddenly think that.... it is very important for a person to have favourites in his or her life... your favourite movie..fav singer..fav drink..fav food....fav book.... why?..because it makes life so much easier for other people.

the other day.... i was just shopping to buy a present for a friend.....how hard it was..that person did not have preference in anything... in everything also..the answer was cin cai....
come to think of it... if we have favourites...it is also easier for a person to show love and affection to you because then the person would know what to buy for you to make you happy..isn;t this so?...so....pls..pls..pls...have some favourites in something everyone...even if you do not have...create one!!!.....to make ppl's life easier....rite?just like my grandma knows my fav kuih kapit, my father know my fav pomelo and sis know all of my fav things...and i too know hers....chocs , chicken floss popia and pineapple tarts!!! and i'll save the most delicious tarts for her...just bcoz i love her..hehe...

Tuition and pomelos...

2005-02-15T15:48:00.000+08:00

I am now currently teaching tuition in the place of mummy dearest. She is currently doing her master in Education.I think she must be really busy and exhausted having to earna living as a lectureer and at the same time study for her Masters. Anyway, i really enjoy teaching the kids...( can bluff them with stories i simply make up ..and the most intersting part is that... they actually believe what i say !!Of course... they are only stories..so i guess its ok to simply make up stories to light up the class)

ya..what about pomelos and tuition.
well...i teach tuition..but i don't get paid for it !! my dad gets all the money. But, i was the one who told him that he doesn't need to pay me. i am already direly grateful to them for bringing me up..so, who am i to ask them to pay me for this little favour i am doing for them. it was just to relief my mama of her burdens. what about the pampers, milk powder, education they had to pay for the whole of my life, rite?..anyway... i know dad feels bad for not paying me...so everytime after tuition, he would go buy a pomelo for me... so sweet of him , huh?..and i'll finish the pomelo that day itself while watching tv. The pomelo sometimes even though might taste a little sourish but is filled with a taste of sweetness.. a taste of love.... and i think love rules..above alll!!! love rules...above all things...even pomelo..

TOO MUCH COOKIES!!!

2005-02-15T15:31:00.000+08:00

hai....down with cough and cold yesterday. couldnt go uni because no transport to uni!!so pathetic! anyway...mum promised to buy me a kancil!! am waiting ever so eagerly...wonder when is it coming..so excited la!!!

y cough and cold? i think its bcoz of the cookies i ate...everyday...cookies and kuih kapit. i love the kuih kapit so much that i finished the whole tin of kuih kapit in2 days!! its really nice. made by my beloved grandmama. she says that when her hand heals ( she fractrued her wrist ) she'll make somemore kuih kapit especially for me!!! aww...how nice of her!!! i think my family really loves me a lot. then my sis...the last time i went penang to visit her.. she bought 'tarn sarn' ( twisted biscuit ) for me around 1 packet and i finished it all at one go. she saw how much i loved it and learnt how to make it for me. so, this chinese new year..she actually made one tin of it for me!!!!my sister, the girl who never steps into the kitchen to cook...made biscuit just for me !!!see how they love me !!! i really dunno what i can do to repay their love. i miss my sister so much...and she is leaving to penang again tomorrow....if only tomorrow never comes...then i can have her by my side....for the rest of my life!!!!

Chinese New Year.!!

2005-02-15T15:22:00.000+08:00

AHhhh...my favourite festival of all..where all my relatives come and visit...hehe
LAst time, on the first day of cny... our family always had to travel to seremban to visit out ' agong' .but..ever since he passed away..we stayed at our house every first day of cny. then, grandmama will cook her most delicious 'chai choy'--my favourite, chai curry, and chai duck. really very happy this cny...so happy that i don't even feel like starting uni , studying again. how nice it would be if life was just spending time with your family doing things together everyday... i think family is so important. its so nice to have them around even though they are of ages 80 or even 6. the warmth and comfort they give just by being there...the feeling is so different.
had 3 lou sang this year...wahh...i love lou sang..!!! if only we could have it all year round!! i pestered my mom to buy lou sang just for me to eat..but ..i think its very expensive...haha..nvm....ill just keep pestering until she buys me one lou sang just for my own consumption .!!!

Smart people ...listen up!!!Betrayal and deceitfulness

2005-01-27T13:11:00.000+08:00

Have been watching lotsa reality TV shows lately. The Apprentice, simple life, America's next top supermodel...makes me really think. Why are human beings just sooo selfish?just in order to get what they want and for their own personal benefit, they are willing to hurt their closest friends, closest people around them !!! These people we are talking about , are the people who were there for u, and will be by your side no matter what the circumstances were. MY goodness...have ppl of this age lost their heart?..where oh where oh my dear Lord is your loving people, the people you created to love each other ? i truly reckon that satan is really having a strong hold at these end times. Even my dear fellow christian friends are of such. What do i make of these things ?Members of churches are quarelling, fighting neck to neck for some apparent stupid simple things. it is at this time that makes you wonder....if only i were a kid again. no worries, no troubles...free from all the evils of the world.

What do you make out of friends whom u trusted and then betrayed you when you least expect it? well, i met one recently. why am i just so really unlucky? or is it just me always failing to recognise and distinguish which are the friends to trust and which not to? all my life....i have been betrayed and betrayed again by friends... friends who betrayed me just for the sake of their own selfish ambitions.

Do you know how it feels to be betrayed by someone you trust?
It really hurts so much deep down inside, worst than breaking up ( I think..i dunno...haven't been in one so i really dunno ) . anyway, i think being a friend no matter what friend or no matter how long you have known the friend for..be it 10 years, 2 weeks or even a day! You must be sincere...giving ur best to him or her and not wanting anything in return, not wanting u yourself to gain any benefit or to be able to achieve your own selfish needs. i think it is just utterly not right!Even if you think that friend is stupid or not compatible to your thoughts in mind, have you not a sense of humility?

God created some slow and some fast, some smart and some less competent, why?....in order for us to learn from each other, to be a better person for the furtherance of His Kingdom. Ok, so you are smart..so what? it does not mean that you know more things than the one less competent. In fact, sometimes, you might even learn some valuable life lessons from the latter!the Bible said " When you are weak, you are strong ; When you are poor, you are rich" It doesn't say so without a purpose! For everything was created with a purpose. We were created so we are able to glorify God!!! not to disgrace Him by lying, cheating, betraying, deceiving!!! We were born to the world naked, it means with nothing with us. we brought nothing with us,...so who are we to demand things from people, who are we to deserve the best things for ourselves. who are we to even groan " why are they so slow? so stupid?Why can't they just think a bit faster?. work a bit harder? " The fact that you are smarter is enough to thank God for what you have and have a sense of responsibility to share your smartness around. haha...if only all the smart people were like that... there won't be any dumbos walking around anymore...haha. So, smart people, listen up !!!

Blurry Lab Session and Dumbness

2005-01-14T11:41:00.000+08:00

just finish lab today....was in a super duper blurry mood... didn't know what i was doing..luckily i had a good lab mate....may yee to untangle my blurrness...hehe..but i felt rather stupid...hmmmm..talking about stupidity, blurrness and junie.. i thinkk they all come hand-in-hand...they are all correlated.don't you think?

Do you ever feel looked down upon or that u think u are so stupid..and everyone else seem to be just smarter than you are? well...that's what i feel all the time...whenever i step my foot in IMU. its like....how come everyone else can finish doing pharmaceutical calculations so fast and you are like the last to finish? why does everyone like to teach you to do things or tell you to do things?..are you really that dumbo ?or is it how you have potrayed yourself that made people feel that they need to tell about smthg.?did they finish doing all calculations so fast because they are naturally smart or did they do some exercises before or is it just another scene of the dumbo me?why...why did God create some smart and some less smart @dumbo like me?...haha...whatever it is...i am still happy being me!!!i guess i just have to accept the fact that some pppl are smarter than the others and that smartness does not necessarily determine the happiness of one's life. some ppl just have to work harder than the rest in order to achive the same results.

But , i must still say ...self-confidence is so important in a person's life! Whenever i feel down or feel stupid.or feel like a dumbo..i will have low self-confidence and will talk less....its funny...and it is just a very spontaneous reaction to the way i feel

Torn between Friends

2005-01-11T13:08:00.000+08:00

haih...start of new semester marks start of new conflicts....
but, my conflicts are such that it does not involve others but only myself!!! what a weird conflict i would say.....
i just find life as a 20 year...so different from life when i was in high school...in high school i had a bunch of friends...a fixed bunch of friends...we do everything together...from studying to camping together....

but now....studying..i have a gang....hanging out lepaking...another gang... it is just so...different..
all the time..i just keep asking myself...do i belong to this gang or that gang?..does it even matter whether i belong to a gang anot?..is it that impotant to feell this sense of belonging?...but...life is a single persons' journey isnt it?no one is gonna care whether u are lonely at times or not...no one..!!!u are the one who has to make the initiative..to ask around what activities they are having in order to feel belonged....so..again..its a conflict of self...why..oh..why am i having so much conflict within me?..why oh why...do i iquestion myself so much?...can't life be as simple as ABC?..no...there must be boy girl..conflicts....there must be friends conflicting each other...haih....where do i belong?where do you belong?

Friends vs Best Friends

2005-01-11T13:06:00.000+08:00

Friend: calls your parents by mr. and mrs.
Best friend: calls your parents dad and mom.

Friend: has never seen you cry
Best friend: has always had the best shoulder to cry on

Friend: never asks for anything to eat or drink
Best friend: opens the fridge and makes herself at home

Friend: asks you to write down your number.
Best friend: they ask you for their number
(cuz they can't remember it)

Friend: borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
Best friend: has a closet full of your stuff
Friend : you have to awkwardly ask them for favours
Best Friend : will offer their help before you even ask

Friend: only knows a few things about you
Best friend: could write a biography on your life story

Friend: will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing
Best friend: will always go with you

Friend: would delete this letter
Best friend: will send this back to me and all of their online
buddies

>>Friends Forever!

Written with a pen

Sealed with a kiss

If you are my friend,

Please answer this:

>>Are we friends or are we not?

>>You told me once, but I forgot..

>>So tell me now and tell me true,

>>So I can say, I am here for you.

Of all the friends I've ever met,

>>You're the ones I won't forget..
>>
>>And if I die before you do,
>>
>>I'll go to Heaven
>>
>>And wait for you.

2005-01-04T13:39:00.000+08:00

Philip, Junie and Samantha mopping the floor. Debbie holding the camera.

Phillip, Samantha and I . Thumbs up for the bestest choc chip Samantha ever made!!Her First attempt in baking!!Samantha says she loves to bake but don't have the equipments.So, i brought the turboboiler and the baking tray to Phillip's house to bake. Samantha went to Carrefour to buy the instant choc chip cookie mixture with Phillip.

It was quite an exciting first -time attempt as the butter over-melted. sop we had to put the butter back into the freezer to harden a bit. while waiting....we had sushi and vitagen. that samantha i tell u...loves to drink vitagen soooo much!! she finished 5 or botols of vitagen all in less than 15 mins!!! I think if she goes for drinking vitagen competition ...she will win la!!!

the cookies nearly got burnt!!! hehe...although i didn't tell them...

Excursion to the Bird Park

2004-12-09T23:26:00.000+08:00

Went to Kuala Lumpur Bird Park with the Sunday school last saturday. was a last minute decision. went with my elder sister. it was quite fun. took my digital camera which i thought could be used to tke a lot of pictures. but when it reached to number 10.... hahaha...guess wat....the screen read : no more memory space'. haiyoh!! so frust!!! wat kinda digital camera!!! 10 pictures and that is it! luckily it's not ours.. my dad borrowed it from his school.. such lousy camera!!

saw a lot of hornbills and birds.' talked' to a cuckatoo. at least when i said hello to it. it replied hello to me. it was actually trying to open its cage door when i visited it. then when i went over, it came to me and tried to imitate wat i said. when i i screamed it tried to scream like me too!!! but, when other people said hello to it... it didnt imitate them... im thinking....maybe i have some sorta bird magnet or something..hehe.

got to know a sunday school kid--ann ru. very brave little girl. 5 years old..but she is as mature as a 7 year old. she was the only kid who dared to hold a parrot on her tiny weeny fingers! when i was 5 , i was terrified of all these!!she then even volunteered to feed the birds by hand!! my Goodness, such fine training by her mother. During lunch time, She said she was vegetarian, so her mother packed her some doughnuts for lunch whilst the other kids were happily enjoying their nuggets and chips. My sis and i told her she could eat the chips... it was vegetarian. she hesitated at first because according to her mother, they are not allowed to eat chips. Her mother has never brought her to eat MAc Donalds. then, we persuaded her and finally she took the chips. Boy, was she happy to eat those chips which were just ordinary french fries! This girl here is so deprived of her childhood!!! when i was 5, almost every week went KFC for supper and i would be happily chowing down my kentucky fried chicken. but,i'm growing so bored of it now...haha..such irony of life is it not?

anyway... she ate 3/4 of the french fries. i asked her why not finish it?, she said : "very delicious, i want to save it for later....finish already no more lor... " then, my sis and i gave her some more chips. when her brother found out, he threated her and said he's gonna tell her mother she ate chips.. she was so terrified.

we watched the bird show.. and the orang utna show..but i thought the orang utan show was much more interesting. basically, i enjoyed the park, so did my sis and the others i hope. went home that night to help my aunty with her house warming party. helped her to prepare food or rather eat her food ..and become kuli...carry the tables and chairs to the partyt venue. ( most of our family members are girls you see... the only males are my cousin brother, my father and my grandfather. so out of 10, 9 are females. thus, some of us have to sacrifice our gender and help the 'recessive' sex a bit in doing heavy chores' )they had lots of konnyaku jelly and mushrooms there !!!! My favourites!!! I definitely had a big feast of jellies and mushrooms that day!!

2004-12-01T02:34:00.000+08:00

Nipi , Augustine and I .Nipi comes from india. Very friendly girl. her physics is very good.

2004-12-01T02:31:00.000+08:00

Augustine Dale Voon Tran and I. Augustine is the nicest,and cutest boy in A-Levels. Father a vietnamese , mother a Malaysian. But, he is born in America. that accounts to the long weird name.

2004-12-01T02:25:00.000+08:00

my cousin baby sister Yi Wen born and to be bred all the way from England. Ain't she just soooooooo cute?.makes me wanna have one too ...haha!!dream on , junie!

2004-12-01T02:23:00.000+08:00

My cousin baby sister Yi Wen and i taking a nap.

anson and chee yang bday

2004-12-01T01:41:00.000+08:00

went to midvalley yesterday with Zhi Yong, Hcee Yang and Anson, Pei SUng Yi Wen and Ying Jia ....

gave anson a t-shirt which i thought would fit him but.,.it turned out too huge for him..( put on some weight, anson! ) but anyway..anson being anson....was so kind enough to parade the t-shirt aroung midvalley for 15 mins.. then he took it off..haha...i guess this will be the one and only time he'll be wearing the t-shirt..sorry, ya,,,.coudnt estimate your size la...i used my dad as a sample . so , hey. wat do you expect from a belly-bulging-5-months-pregnant man.haha!

went to watch Alexander..which i thought was dead boring!! But, what to do?..paid rm 6 already.,...so not nice also must tell myself : " it was great , man! " so as to not dishearten myself that i have actually wasted 6 bucks on a stupid documentary! actually i had a buy 2 free 1 ticket..but..the counter refuse to accept..!!DArn!!all my effort in printing and finding the ticket online!!!

went jusco...bought all the snacks that wanted and forbidden to buy by my parents ..coz they said it was chemically unstable and would cause cancer...but....i really like it wor..how?...dun care la...die die la....so i bought alot of sotong, finished it all in one go ..then went back to buy again..and went home and finish it again after having my very very late dinner. today went jusco to buy the forbiddne food again...haha1! without my mama's knowledge....but she found out eventually...coz she saw me munching...hehe..scolded me ..but..stubborn junie jhuz wouldnt listen..she just loves it!!

oh, yes...i was oner of the late ones zhi yong mentioned. me tthem at pizza.. took my second lunch with them after having wan tan mee..anson say zhi yong belanja...haha...they bluff me again!!! HMMMMM.....this bunch of friends ...really does confuse me alot...awhile they say one thing..then i believe..after i have believed what they say..they say..they were just kidding....sometimes,,,i just wonder wheter i should continue to trust them or not. more so,...am i so gullible that i can be fooled around.. i really wonder?am i just a toy?then and again..it could just be me being over-sensitive ?i dunno.....i mean...they do treat me like a real friend.or not.sometimes .. i think it hurts quite a little when they joke around with u ..but then they never tell u whats happening..what is the real issue all about. it is as though....they treat u like a small child...like saying : " ahhh....why tell her..she wont understand...don't bother telling her "assuming that what they are talking about is beyond what i can comprehend. it really hurts...but...what can you do?..If they don;t wanna tell you...you cant force them , rite?..so., in the end.....it's down to freedom of speech...arrghh..im crapping again..forgive me.

Why do we join MPS?

2004-12-01T01:25:00.000+08:00

In the recen MPS leadership campe, we went night hike, obstcle course.these two werte the highlights. anyway, Agew brief us on why we MUST MUST MUST join MPS.

It's for the better future of Pharmacists in Malaysia. how so?

Because....MPS reprsents the voice of Malaysian Pharmacists today. if we want to be the one who dispense druge instead of giving the doctors earning those big bugs,MPS will have to voice out to the government. but. ..everytime the MPS voices it out..the government will rebut and say.: " that can't be done, you only have 60 % members.....thus, u are only represneting 60 % of the pharmacist in Malaysia. what about the other 40 %. We dont' know what they are agreeing to. "

So, you see....if more members were to join MPS, we would have a bigger...louder voice...our voice would then be heard. then only we can have a say in this fiery medical world dominated by the ambitious doctors. right now...the doctors are having a bigger say. why?just because they have a larger voice! we can't let them continue dipensing drugs!!! WE ARE THE DRUG DEALERS!!!not them!! they are the Pain healers. MAlaysia is now considered quite a developed country already...more developed then phillipine or thailand. but , look at our pharmacist in malaysia ans theirs! the pharmacist in Phillipine and Thailand are actually the people who dispense drugs to the patients. not the doctors!! So, how far develepoed is Malaysia would you say we are? we are talking about Thailand! and Philipines! people would laugh at us if they knew this! If we are not given the power, we are not given the recognition.!! So, why create sucha job as a pharmacist then?..there must be a function! and the function is to educate the public about the drugs and its side effect and any contraindications it might have... what do they ( the doctors ) know?we are the ones who are specially trained for these..not them. They are trained to diagnose diseases and ailmets. so, why is the power given to them?

but. in order for us to be recognised as pharmacists--the drug dealers of this modern world....the public have to know who we are and what we are here for?...thats why..it is us individuals who will have to tell ...spread around to the people....tell you mothers, fathes, uncles ,aunties, grandpa , grandma, whoever it is that u come across...tell themm.what u do....tell them what a pharmacist does and hwo important we are in this world...then...shall we be known and then ... shall our importance be felt and acknowledged by the government, then , our voices shall be heard even louder!

so, people people....if u do care and want to earn more bugs in your profesion....do urge ur fellow pharmacists to join MPS....its not just a society which allow you to get student discount for movie tickets....it's a place where you can make a difference...a place where you can voice out your opinion to make this world,together,a better place....

Tioman and I

2004-11-10T02:12:00.000+08:00

why did i go?
Dad was saying : "monsoon season...why go tioman? "
but,i still went ..though i did compromise whether anot i should go. but, already paid..so i go la...wat to do.
if i stayed at home..i would not have anything to do also!

any regrets for going?
nope! not at all...except for the fact that i miss eating my homemade jelly at home!!!haha

We were suppose to meet at 11pm in pudu. arrived at 10.30. the bus only left at 11.30. so what did i do in that one hour?..dunno. heng chu , zhi yong and I were so bored of waiting we decided to go 7-eleven look-look see-see, 'pretend' we buy some things there.

who went?
Joe--the leader(as usual), philip, anson, heng chu, zhi yong, kelvin, chee yang, pei sung, yi wen, ah foo, thomas,ee yan, grace, aaron, debbie, rachel, patricia,hua ying
anyone i missed out?..hmmm

what we did there?
took a speed boat to tioman which broke down 1/4 way.so we had to turn bak to mersing and transfer into another speedboat.( the breakdown of the speedboat,according to Quah Joo Lee was intentional. " it's in the package!" ) First time such a thing happen to me. one of the speedboat engine malfunctioned. Thank God we were still able to turn back. if not, we would be stranded in the middle of the sea!! imagine what an adventure it would be if that was to happen. ( i think package not exciting enough la !)hehe

first day... too tired to do anything. was supposed to go to the waterfall. but, the expedition was cancelled due to a heavy downpour. So, we headed for the beach instead.I think the only tourist in Kampung Mukut were us bunch monkeys. So,whatever beach that we landed on was virtually ours and ours alone. went swimming in the sea, played beach-volley. but it appeared to be boring. so, someone came up with the idea of playing beach soccer instead. It was fun!playing with a person who is a soccer-maniac like ee yan, we were of course compelled to follow the rigid rules of soccer. the soccer composure remained.

second day--- sat on a boat to tekek. went snorkelling. on the way, many many people puked.i kinda wished i had some symptoms of motion sickness. secretly, i wished i could experience it as i had never experienced it before. even if i had, it would be just a mild headache, but i never did puke. gotlotsof cuts and bruises from waling on the corals and stones. hurts. no pain ,no gain!

third day-- went to the waterfall. fun!! enjoyed the walk to waterfall!went snorkelling also. went round the island to 'pick up ' some ' abandoned' pomelos. hehe.....the yellow ones were sweet. pomelo stealing was another adventure. the green ones sour.had a beach-soccer match. my team( kelvin, joe and i ) was first ( runner-up ) !ee yan , yi wen and ah foo were the champs . headed back to our resident only to find an electricity black out( another item intentionally included in the package it seems) .the whole island was left pitch-black. Drenched in our wet swimsuits, yi wen, pei sung and i had to bathe together in the small cubical bathroom with the aid of a single canlelight. It was indeed another experience i would not forget. Thanks Girls for letting me bathe together with you all!! hehe...i might have peeked on you.. you never know..hehe. after dinner, we went 'fishing'. started fishing from 10 pm till 4am.any fishes took up the bait. yeah rite, in our dreams probably. was so tired fishing, ended up sleeping on the jetty platform where we fished.

fourth day--packed and left for kl. talked to anson and heng choo on the way home.then, went dinner at FA , played warcraft till 5 am .

<strong>what did we eat in tioman?
breakfast.... was western for the 2nd and last day.it was not nice. one of the bread Philip had was even mouldy!! good thing yi wen saw it and warned him. 3rd day we had nasi lemak. the curry was nice.

lunch...was terribly terrible terrible. i think they fried overnight rice for us. the sambal was bad bad bad..tasteless.everyone frowned upon it ,but grace surprisingly..like it!

dinner ...was long beans, long beans and long beans again...
fried fish, fried fish and fried fish again...
fried tofu, chicken mushroom,
on the last day, we had curry chicken... it was okay...i dunno ..of all meals..i thought dinner was the best!

What i learned from tioman?
1. Philip is a rice pail @ "fan tong". Zhi yong is a lap sap tong @ rubbish bin.
2. Snorkelling is so fun!!!the sea, the fishes, the corals....they are sooo
lovely.those who din go..u all miss out la..
3. I've found someone who is as weird or even weirder than me ...chin heng choo!!!
a person who is as impulsive and whackily crazy like me. i see a mirror
reflection when i see him.
4. corals are dying!!!!snorkelling would not be fun anymore if the condition
worsens. so, people. please....stop global warming!! stop killing the corals. Go
recyling!

Reflections:
Actually, i thought this trip would not be one that i would enjoy. reasons:
1. the people who were going were one i was not really close to.
2. it was monsoon season. u cant do much.
but, i told myself the moment i stepped on the boat :' since i am here now, why dont i just make the best out of it?."and i did! i tried my best to enjoy myself and did whatever that i wanted although sometimes i knew they thought i was acting funny and weird ( like when i ran up and down during the hike to the waterfall ). i ate however much i liked , did whatever i liked, went wherever i wanted.
In a way,again, it makes me think..life Is again a single person's journey. you are born into the world alone and u will leave this world alone. what u do and say is your own decision.what others think of you does not matter, because it is u who is going to go through the journey.
all the while, i have been petrified about what people thought my weirdness to be.i was afraid of being rejected for being so weird and unusual,scared to be different, always wanting to live up to people's expecttions.
after this trip, i am beggining to come into terms with myself.....
weirdness is not disgrace, it is a gift!

hurray!!!FINISH EXAM!!!

2004-11-02T19:10:00.000+08:00

HELLO EVERYBODY!!!

Physio exam finally over!!!! sooo happy...yet so worried. went to ONE Utama with Anna, Sook Theng, Chia Mein and Thomas. watches Terminal. Nice! haiyo...i dunno why..everything that is related to science makes me think of physio only.I go toilet, 'urine rushing wanna come out' i think of kidney regulation'. i think if the word' excitement' i think of 'heart and sympathetic activity' tried so hard to get it out of my mind..but it is just freaking me out!!

been reading comments for my block. never really thought tht people would even care reading about what i write and how i feel. guess i really have to be careful when i write. but, what i write is indeed what i feel. if i offend anyone, i hereby say i'm sorry. ok?ok!

Surprise from sis!!

2004-10-26T22:19:00.000+08:00

went downstairs early in the morning. helped mum with breakfast. went upstairs to bathe . was about to leave house with mum to go uni..then...all of a sudden..pop!! sis appeared at the doorstep!!
so long didn't see her..miss her soooo much ( though i always deny it, but am coming to terms with it )
decided not to go uni instead. wanted to spend tme with her. had breakfast with her then went market with her..bought some groceries. then, i opened her luggage only to find my favourite penang biscuit sitting at a corner.

" i bought for u, eat la " whoa...and eat it i did!! finished one whole packet some more..haih.what to do la..no more penang biscuit fro the rest of the week already. regret finishing it all at once. i think i'm rather of an extremist. once i like something...i will like it sooo much...that's the end of it. but, once my taste changes..i will have no part of it. not touching even a single bit of it.weird, huh?
that's me!! =)

feels so nice to have a complete family at home....
wish sis will never go back...but..this wish will never come true..

Don't tell your secret to your girlfriend who has a boyfriend!!

2004-10-26T21:57:00.000+08:00

Y?..because...she will eventually tell YOUR secret to HER boyfriend!!!
I just found this out today..when i opened up my e-mail and surprise surprise!!..a greeting from her boyfriend...e-mailing me things concerning my secret!!!

arhhggh!!I'm just so pissed off...!! I thought i could trust her with it...but i was wrong!!

Lesson for the day: keep ur secrets away from girls who has a boyfriend...of course, this would be an exception to Anna and Mi Chelle..truly a trustable lot of friends..!!

Guilty

2004-10-25T20:20:00.000+08:00

haiyah...stayed at home whole day today...but didnt do any study.went market buy groceries for grandaunty..then she cook cook cook..i eat eat eat..after eat eat eat..i go sleep sleep sleep.i think it is more of a holiday to me than a study break!

feel so guilty la..din study today..cannot!!tomorrow must go uni and study..must focus..!!must catch up with others!

說愛你!!

2004-10-25T20:10:00.000+08:00

說愛你 (電影(空中敗金女)中文主題曲)

詞:天天曲:周杰倫

我的世界變得奇妙更難以言喻
還以為是從天而降夢境
直到確定手的溫度來自你的心裡
這一刻我終於勇敢說愛你
一開始我只顧著看你
裝做不經意心卻飄過去
還竊喜你沒發現我躲在角落
忙著快樂忙著感動
從彼此陌生到熟會是我們從沒想過
真愛到現在不敢期待
要証明自己曾被你想起 Really?
我胡思亂想就從今天起I WISH
像一個陷阱卻從未猶豫相信
你真的願意就請給我驚喜

關於愛情過去沒有意想的結局
那天起卻顛覆了自己邏輯
我的懷疑所有答案因你而明白
轉阿轉就真的遇見了Mr.Right

我的世界變得奇妙更難以言喻
還以為是從天而降夢境
直到確定手的溫度來自你的心裡
這一刻我終於勇敢說愛你

wah!!..so meaningful this song.I like it!!!speaks so much..thanx Tze Yan!

why should i care?

2004-10-22T23:16:00.000+08:00

"Losing Grip"
Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby
Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real
Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you
Why'd you turn away?
Here's what I have to say I was left to cry there,
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided
[chorus]
Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
You, you need to listen I'm starting to trip,
I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone

Am I just some chick you place beside you to take somebody's place
when you turn around can you recognize my face you used to love me,
you used to hug me
But that wasn't the case
Everything wasn't ok I was left to cry there
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided

[chorus]

Crying out loud I'm crying out loud
Crying out loud I'm crying out loud

Open your eyes
Open up wide
Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there
when I was scared I was so alone Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care
If you don't care then I don't care were not going newhere
Why should I care cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care If you don't care then i don't care we're not going newhere

back to imu and back home

2004-10-22T22:46:00.000+08:00

went back to imu yesterday..thought i would study better in uni...quite true.,but..dunno wat actually prompted me to go back ..but i din have to sit lrt to go back!!!! yea!! mum was on the way to work..so...she sent me...she said she was free that day...spent 2 hours with her..talking about life in uni....life as Junie..wats been going on...how i am feeling.had brekfast with her in Sri Petaling. Shared some stories about friends in IMU.How they "take care" of me..buy food for me from Food Avenue and say its the FA taukeh balanja me wan..when actually they paid for it.!!.. how they took care of my Futsal injured wound which personally would not have bothered taking care of properly if i was staying at home and not in vista.

went for taekwando.was left alone again..ate in the middle of the night...Phillip la!! cahllenge me..to study till 5 am. i thought of taking up the challenge, so i ate to keep awake..who knows..after eating...doink...i slept!!..so..i lost int he challege!! haih!!.physio not easy ..especially defense system..so many new things to learn and memorise.

woke up this morning..been thinking whether to go Tioman a not....6 girls going only.hmmm..
..been thinking whether to go home to study a not..
went to library...met siau rong, Debbie and Phillip..asked them.

many a time..i think we like to make conclusions of a person....i think it is really so unfair to that person..people , people....why do wehave to judge a person?...who are we to judge?..arent we just mere mortals exisiting to enhance and lighten the lives of others?and not condemming and making others feel bad and loath themselves?why?...why cant we give a fair chance to people around us to be themselves and not be judged based on what they say and do?

BM oral

2004-10-13T13:07:00.000+08:00

haih.... finally finish BM. so relieve.Very happy because scored quite well. Pou wee got 37 for BM out of 60.!! shocking!! but, he told us the story behind. let's just keep it behind the scenes and thank those who helped him with his score. he very funny la, got 7 marks from cikgu just for saying " Betul!! " haha!! Congrats, pou wee!! You are the man!!

friday got english. dunno la.scared.

yesterday was really messy day. During cheerlead, things happened. i know its quite stupid to get frustrated over some tiny weeny thing. arghh....why couldn't i control my emotions ...!! tried not to show it but everyone realised. but, no one really cared how i felt...( i guess). since getting into IMU, i realised life is really one's own journey. You determine what you gonna do next, it is you who determine who you want to mix with, who are your real friends, no one's gonna care unless you take the initiative move first. isnt life funny? Sometimes, its really lonely down below. But, then and again, what can you do...?Life IS a single journey.

Anyway, feel really useless sometimes. i know i can do somethings but..why can;t people just let me try!!! noo harm trying!!!arrgghgh! sometimes, it feels really really sad when people look at you and see a small little girl. it is perfectly fine if i look like a small girl ( hey, God is the one who gave me this look , okay?), but, the worst part of it is...they treat you as a small little girl as welll!!!..i mean..hullloo...im already how old oo..i know how to think okay...?sometimes, i might act a bit silly but that doesn't mean i AM really a dungu !! it is seriously depressing when people think you don't know how to think!!! what is up with this world la!!!!

helloo

2004-10-13T12:57:00.000+08:00

today is my first time logging in...hmmm..feels very funny to be writing in blogspot. Elyne helped me to use my page. i dunno wat is it for ...but it sounds fun..so im just trying it out. dunno whether i will last ....let's juz wait and see